Tattoos: Getting Them & Getting Over Them

To want a tattoo, you first have to be in denial. "This is a great idea!"

To get a tattoo, you need only a fist-full of cash, a friend in the business, or a prison sentence. It takes less than an hour to make a decision that you might regret for the rest of your life. It's right up there with unwanted pregnancies. The only difference is that children can change a person's life in a good way.

So, you think you planned your tattoos. You've got it all figured out. You found something that you think speaks volumes about you. Maybe it's a picture, or an ancient symbol. You tell your friends that "It's Chinese for 'wisdom', and I am wise." Right. It could say Kung Pow Chicken, for all you know. How many truly wise people do you know who are deliberate, thoughtful and also covered with tattoos? None? I thought so.

Before you decide that your tattoo idea is a good one, ask yourself if you think you'd enjoy condemning yourself to a lifetime of stupidity and regret. If you can honestly answer that question with a "yes", then please know that I'll be here to console you and maybe give you tattoo removal advice when your feelings about your tattoos change.

While you are impatiently awaiting the next post, please enjoy a PSA from Saturday Night Live's commercial parody series.

SNL: Dr. Turlington's Lower Back Tattoo Removal